My Future Self n' Me
The boys find a marijuana cigarette left in the woods by some high-schoolers. All the kids are afraid to touch it. They think coming in contact with marijuana could lead to doing harder drugs. Stan bravely steps forward, picks it up and throws it away. Not too long after the incident in the woods, Stan's "Future Self" shows up on his doorstep. He is a drug addicted loser that's failed at life. Stan's parents kindly take him in. However when Stan learns that Butters has a "Future Self" as well (also a doping loser), he becomes suspicious. The boys soon discover that these "future selves" are really employees of Motivationcorp, a company hired by their parents to scare the kids into avoiding drugs and doing well in school. Stan and Butters, furious at being tricked, visit a company called The Parental Revenge Center of Western America in order to seek retribution. It's run by Cartman, who for a small fee paints the interior of Butters' parents' home with poop. Meanwhile, Stan tries to get his parents to confess they're lying to him by pretending to chop off his hand, to see if his future self's hand will also disappear. But his parents won't give in and admit to the deception. When Butters' parents see the poo-coated walls, they break down and admit that the whole Future Butters thing is a fraud. Stan finally calls his parents out and they also fess up, stating that they should have told him that drugs are a waste of time rather than exaggerating their dangers. After he paints the walls of Motivationcorp with poop, Cartman admits he's been thinking about taking better care of himself and working harder. Suddenly Future Cartman appears to tell him that this is the moment he turns his life around for the better. Unimpressed and pissed off, Cartman spitefully informs his future self that he plans to overeat and do drugs. Instantly, his future self morphs into a fat plumber.
What I Learned Today
"The best way to try to motivate somebody is by being direct with them, to be honest with them. I think the whole future self thing is a lie, and lies are never the right way to get your message across."
- "Look, you can make your wiener bigger in just three weeks." (Butters)
- "I want you to take a look at some of these poop swatches." (Cartman)
- "Yeah, well, three hundred gallons of poop isn't gonna smell like a garden, Butters." (Cartman)
- "Yeah Stan, why don't you go upstairs and play with yourself?" (Stan's dad)
- "I know how it feels to be really, really pissed off at your parents. And I will work hard -- for you." (Cartman)
- "You know what us ultra-liberals say: When it comes to children and drugs, lies are okay." (Motivationcorp Manager)
- "Poop smearing is the hot ticket right now, Stan. Have you seen the poop swatches?" (Cartman)
- "Just for that I'm gonna spend my whole childhood eating what I want and doing drugs when I want! Whateva, I do what I want!!" (Cartman)
Future Stan, Future Butters, and Future Cartman.
The campy, sitcom-style theme song "My Future Self -n- Me," which plays over the montage of Stan and his Future Self frolicking around.
Behind The Scenes
Where Did The Idea Come From
Trey and Matt were offended by over-the-top anti-drug commercials that implied that doing drugs just once could kill you, or that purchasing drugs funded terrorists. This episode tries to get across the idea that the real danger of drugs is that they screw up your life and turn you into a loser.
Pop Culture References
Future Butters is infatuated with the TV sitcom Becker, which Butters describes as "so stupid."
The Osbournes. When Stan's mom catches him watching their MTV reality show, she warns that, "It's going to make you retarded."
Cartman seems to speak fluent Spanish, which he uses to communicate with the Hispanic work crew he's hired to paint Butters' parents' house with poop. Although it's unclear whether it's one of his comedy bits, Jimmy admits to doing ecstasy, saying, "me and my girlfriend took it, and we stayed up all night having s-s-sex."
While flipping channels after The Osbournes, we briefly see a glimpse of the Cheesy Poofs commercial from Season 2's "Roger Ebert Should Lay Off the Fatty Foods."
We learn from Future Stan that Sharon's maiden name is "Kimble" and Randy doesn't like chicken.
Butters reveals his "terrible secret" -- his villainous alter ego as Professor Chaos -- to Stan in this episode. Unfortunately, Stan confuses this terrible secret with Butters admitting he's gay.
With poop smearing being the "hot ticket," Cartman has these assorted poop swatch colors available: Nut N' Corn Crunch, Classic Brown, Baby Green, Pepto Black, Basic Tan, Black and Tan Swirl, Cookies n' Cream, and Hangover Yellow.
- e1 Freak Strike
- e2 Jared Has Aides
- e3 Asspen
- e4 The New Terrance and Phillip Movie Trailer
- e5 Fun with Veal
- e6 Professor Chaos
- e7 The Simpsons Already Did It
- e8 Red Hot Catholic Love
- e9 Free Hat
- e10 Bebe's Boobs Destroy Society
- e11 Child Abduction is Not Funny
- e12 A Ladder to Heaven
- e13 The Return of the Fellowship of the Ring to the Two Towers
- e14 The Death Camp of Tolerance
- e15 The Biggest Douche in the Universe
- e16 My Future Self 'n' Me
- e17 Red Sleigh Down