Cartman is forced to get enormous eyeglasses. Even worse, they're stapled to his head. Even worse than that, his ophthalmologist constantly makes fat jokes about him. Unsure about what to do, he and the other boys turn to Chef for advice. To their horror, they discover that their friend/spiritual advisor/life coach has a new girlfriend who's got him whipped. He's actually quit his job at the school cafeteria and signed on to work at an accounting firm. Unbelievably, the two even plan to marry.
Running low on male role models, the kids ask Mr. Garrison what to do. He says that Chef's girlfriend, Veronica, is a succubus -- a female demon who sucks the life force from men. The boy's try to warn Chef, to no avail. Instead they meet Chef's parents who are in town for the wedding. The couple is from Scotland and they regale them with stories of their bizarre encounters with the Loch Ness monster -- a monster who keeps asking them for "tree-fiddy" ($3.50).
After much study, Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Cartman (now temporarily blinded by botched laser eye surgery) learn that a succubus controls men's minds by relentlessly playing a particular melody (in Veronica's case, The Morning After from the original Poseidon Adventure). On the bright side, playing the tune backwards can destroy the succubus. At Chef and Veronica's wedding, Cartman plays the song backwards while Stan and Kyle sing the reversed lyrics. The succubus goes berserk, kills Kenny and gets sucked back into hell. Chef becomes his old self again.
Cartman solves his vision problems by taking Kenny's head to the ophthalmologist so he can swap out his dead friend's eyes for his own. Mysteriously, just before the operation begins, the doctor asks Cartman if he has $3.50.
What I Learned Today
"Never let poontang come between you and your friends."
- "Meaningless sex is fun for 20 or 30 years, but after that it starts to get old." Chef
- "Women can kill. Poontang's expensive. That's why when it comes to chicks I just screw 'em and leave 'em." Herbert Garrison
- "Well aren't you crackers just cute as the dickens." Thomas McElroy
- "I ain't giving you no tree-fiddy you God damned Loch Ness monster!" Thomas McElroy
- "How's my little piggy today?" Dr. Lott
- "Derp!" Mr. Derp
- "Bitch, I hate that bitch!" Cartman
- "Ma'am, we're having a dude moment here, if you don't mind." Cartman
- "Thanks for the news flash, Tom Brokow" Cartman
- "I wasn't sleeping, I was just thinking really hard." Cartman
- "She's a god damn succubus!!" Thomas McElroy
Kenny dies once, then gets resurrected and killed again. The first time he's seen waiting with the other boys for Chef, who has stood them up. They wait all day and through the night (during which Kenny, inexplicably, is seen dead and covered with rats). But when morning comes he's back on his feet. He dies the second time at the hands (or actually, feet) of the succubus. Veronica is also banished back to the soul-sucking depths of hell.
Behind The Scenes
Singing the song The Morning After backwards proved supremely difficult. Even worse, Matt and Trey found they couldn't get the backward version out of their minds.
Where Did The Idea Come From
The running gag in which Chef's parents talk about their encounters with the Loch Ness monster -- who always asks them for or tree-fiddy -- was something Matt and Trey developed while still in college. Originally Chef's character was supposed to be some kind of X-Files-type paranormal adventurer, but the concept was dropped -- and moved to his parents.
Pop Culture References
During his eye exam, Cartman is told to choose between two slides. We see that they are actual pictures of Carmen Electra and Britney Spears.
Mr. Garrison gives a lecture on The Facts of Life. The sitcom, not actual life lessons.
When Cartman (wearing his giant glasses) visits the accounting firm where Chef has taken a job, the receptionist asks if he's "that cute little kid from Jerry McGuire."
A sign outside one of the cubicles at the accounting firm where Chef works states that it belongs to I.P. Freely.
In the wedding vows, Priest Maxi asks Veronica if "she would take Chef to be her daddy".
- e1 Rainforest Shmainforest
- e2 Spontaneous Combustion
- e3 The Succubus
- e4 Tweek vs. Craig
- e5 Jakovasaurs
- e6 Sexual Harassment Panda
- e7 Cat Orgy
- e8 Two Guys Naked in a Hot Tub
- e9 Jewbilee
- e10 Chinpoko Mon
- e11 Starvin' Marvin in Space
- e12 Korn's Groovy Pirate Ghost Mystery
- e13 Hooked on Monkey Fonics
- e14 The Red Badge of Gayness
- e15 Mr. Hankey's Christmas Classics
- e16 Are You There, God? It's Me, Jesus
- e17 World Wide Recorder Concert